Brief update.

Funny thing is, I'm starting to like posting here. Less populated, more limited (relevant) audience. While I enjoy the little Q&A meme every once in awhile I don't have to worry about furry porn or mega-diagrams or pseudo-postings/cries for help aimed at semi-significant others...

I think keeping health in mind and relevant happenin's is a good thing here. Plus I love this blog's aesthetic.

So anyway, I'm still sick as hell, but so far I'm actually eating semi-healthy. I may or may not work out tomorrow, we'll see how I feel. I DO need to get some more sleep and some rest. I feel like I'm on the tail-end of this one, but I still feel like I got hit by a truck.

Not much else to say health-wise, except i needs to be gettin' back to ma homework.

peace
matt

1. Motor Learning Study (Notecards) ---Done
   
2. Motor Development Interview Written Product---Interview done, now when the hell am I gonna write that?
   
3. Organize High School Methods Folder---Monday night
   
4. Study for Biomechanics Quiz--- Prior to biomechanics? Might have to bite that bullet. I'm so tired.
   
5. Revise lesson file for Elementary Methods---Done

So how was your day? Mine was not surprisingly work-filled. Still kind of distracted by the internet. Not too bad though. Even snuck a nap and a Taco-Bell date in with the lady-friend. And yes, today was filled with Tea and Coffee!

I'm sick again. Anna's been trying to take care of me. We're both so goddamn busy. Frisbee has been the only time I've worked out for a long time. I'm thinking Wednesday I'll try to get back on the running horse.

I need to plan a menu for the week.

I HAVE sat consistently at least once a day for about 4 days now. Which may be some kind of record.

It occured to me yesterday that with some very easily movable furniture I have more space than the average college kid is blessed with in my living room and also in my bedroom when it's clean. I'll need to consider utilizing that as a workout option.

Dear god, I'm not turning in before Midnight am I? I must REALLY be sick...

peace,
matt

New List. How is your Sunday?

1. Motor Learning Study (Notecards)
2. Motor Development Interview/Written Product
3. Organize High School Methods Folder
4. Study for Biomechanics Quiz
5. Revise lesson file for Elementary Methods
   

Almost done interviewing Mom for number 2, and I've started cards for number 1.

3 and 4 will be easy. 5 should be a snap too.

::gassho:: (I like signing posts like that. Hmm)

Prepping for Sunday

Ugh, It's almost 4:00am. Sunday has gotta be "get my shit together" day. This is turning into a journal more than a health blog. It's affecting my health. Also, I'm sick.

Fuck all around, ya?

Sunday will be a good day. There will be tea. Lots and lots of tea. I'll edit this entry/repost the bottom half tomorrow as a review. I'm not addicted to int4rw3bz.

For Sunday:

10:15--Wake, zazen, breakfast, clean room.

At noon:

1. Motor Learning Study (Notecards)
2. Motor Development Interview/Written Product
3. Organize High School Methods Folder
4. Study for Biomechanics Quiz

That looks like it's doable in an 8-hour time-frame, ya?

Also, I'm going to try an experiment. I'm going to do this all as silently and media-free as possible. Compassionate communication with those around me, but AIM and music only for breaks. Not even trippy flute music, and I'm not going to light incense--I'm not going to assault the ears or the eyes or the nose tomorrow. So, "pure, mindful work" is the order of the day.

Your quote for the day:
"How wonderful!
How wonderful!
All beings are perfect,
exactly as they are!"
--the Buddha

With a little luck I'll have time for some fun.
peace
matt

I've been pretty bad lately. Not a lot of activity. Not a great diet. Not a lot of sleep.

So I've sort of begun trying to get back to the ground up. Started sitting again. It's always an "on the horse/off the horse" thing with me. Same goes for working out.

Another Frisbee game tonight. Should be fun. Hopefully I last a little longer, as I probably can pace myself slightly better. I should be able to eat a little better in preparation for it as well.

My roommate is captain of a soccer team. I keep thinking I should go to a practice just to see what it's like.

Anyway, I have another class. If it wasn't worth 1% of my grade I'd skip it too. Just dragging total ass today.

Sorry to be such a downer. Peace.

matt

So, Ultimate Frisbee

Holy shit. More details later :) I'm hooked.

I found a website

I really like this one. It has a great big "Zenny" theme to it, but the guy really seems to know what he's talking about. He knows what sounds new age and what doesn't, and it's basically just a kind of "simple living/self-help" kinda website. Cool stuff.

http://zenhabits.net/2008/07/the-beginners-guide-to-zen-habits-a-guided-tour/

I've been playing with the idea of waking up very early to do things, and I think I'm going to start doing that this week. I'll be waking up at 6:30 every day this week (I already wake up at 7:00, and get out of bed at 7:20 or later) but I think I'm going to actually get up and move this week. I'm going to try to get my homework done nice and early (not) so we'll see how this one works.

I was going to pseudo-fast today, but I got a wonky start waking up late and staying up late. Been eating okay. I want to get into the habit of "grazing" more. I'd rather not buy from the Union so much. School is exhausting, but I guess that's life. That's part of waking up early. I loves me some sleep, but if I get on top of things maybe I'll have time for relaxing/napping later in the day?

Especially if I get a workout going on in the morning. That will be cool if I can get that on track.

I'm seriously going to print out a lot of those pages on the website, pop a squat at Starbucks or Panera (decision pending) read those.

Lesson File done by 8. Literacy done between classes. We'll see how this waking up business suits me. I should have time if all goes according to plan to catch up to my other work.

Waking up in 6 hours.

I feel really strange about my health right now. I know I haven't eaten healthy, but I have a feeling of a loss of control. I may need to run by myself a few times just to get the feeling back. Find my freakin' mp3 player again just so I can make a play list.

Anna is trying to have a super healthy week. I will probably talk to her about how exactly she is accomplishing that. She doesn't want to call it a diet. I kinda want to fast. I probably shouldn't tell anyone, might get the whistle blown on me. It's not really a good decision but I am feeling the need for some detoxification.

I have my own space almost set up in my room though, so we'll see how that goes. Shared space is strange. I shared a room growing up and the minute I got my own room I fought tooth and nail to keep it that way. It's strange to go back, especially when there is a reasonable expectation to be present with the one you are sharing the room with.

It's relevant because I am very picky about how I spend my time, which is not to say it's organized, but that I have control over it. I'm a head case. I wonder if I could do an aerobic sort of workout in this room?

I need to go to the grocery store. I need to slow down how much money I'm spending on food and coffee, but I should go make some smart purchases at the drug store.

Considering getting up early to go run. Anna is pretty good about not waking up until she needs to.

Whew, 14 hours of sleep. Mex-ee-can, and feeling a little better. Trying to get rid of the crud. Can't quite shake it yet, probably won't for a couple of weeks. I don't get sick a lot but it takes years for me to get over one.

Should start running tomorrow again. No, I still don't know how much I weigh, but to go off of feeling and how I look like how we health professionals and everyone are supposed to, then I need to get back on the horse.

Had an interesting conversation with Anna about how people can be in the fields we are in and not be the epitome of health given our knowledge. I think that speaks to the affective domain of education, the one that is most often over looked or thought of after the fact. It's one thing to know how the thing is done, it's quite another to feel that you want to.

Everyone wants to win--not everyone has the will to suffer to win.

Anyway, off to imbibe massive amounts of either coffee or diet pepsi, haven't decided yet. Current pipe/day dream of the day: cleaning up my bedroom for actual use today. We'll see.

I feel like shit.

later

I'm sick. I have no sense of my health right now. I probably put some back on, but I haven't been that hungry and I have been semi-active. Sleep is looking soooo delicious right now.

Good night. More substantive writings and decisions later.

239 or less i suspect. my legs hate me. so do my eyelids. nap time yaaay!

--matt

Quick Minute:

Ran today at about 1:00, took my sweet time recovering/eating lunch, etc... but that's how it goes. I ran 2 miles @ 10 minutes each. Not a big run, but I'm not in severe pain--A good run considering my recent hiatus.

It wasn't the detox day I thought it would be, but I didn't exactly commit to that. I think I'll just try to be smart this week. I desperately want Wendy's right now, probably because I'm about to go see a movie @ the union.

I'm feeling a little better today. I'm going to clean the apartment up, revise my homework, and just relax. I may study tonight, but I'm not even going to pressure myself--we'll see how I feel tonight. I have time tomorrow and I'm perfectly comfortable doing it then. I promised Anna I'd be a good support for her this week, so it's important that I'm on top of my shit too.

I can't remember when I'm supposed to run next. I think I'm supposed to meet Anna at noon at the rec? I'll talk to her tonight, and post it on here.

I still have no idea how much I weigh. Ah well.

I ran 2 miles with not a whole lot of difficulty, I just wanted to stop, so I did lol.

Okay, I'm off to go manage my time wisely or something. Have fun,

--Matt

This is a pretty depressing entry probably, and maybe even more LJ material than anything, but I'm going to post it here because this blog is about my health and it also has a much more limited, intimate audience.

I'm pretty depressed lately. I don't know why. I'm enjoying myself, but I just feel trapped in something, I don't know what. I think it could be just plain and simple anxiety from all the stuff that's happening this semester. It's been a plausible, convenient excuse.

I find myself fighting to keep some aspects of my life simple. I strive for a simple lifestyle, and a big part of that is living an intentionally healthy one. However, I find that it takes effort that is frustrating, and if there is any guilt whatsoever built into a decision made that will affect health, it can send one on a spiral of poor health and poor decisions quickly.

We see this happen a lot when someone decides they have irrevocably cheated on their diet. “Well, I already screwed this up, may as well have another piece of cake…” Obviously, only having one piece is better than having two, but fighting the guilt is much harder than doing the math.

In my previous entry, Anna and I went out to eat at Mexican just to have fun and celebrate and stuff. We (I, more likely) haven’t stopped eating like that. I tried to make good decisions at some restaurants—I tried to stock up on sushi at the Asian buffets rather than stock up on the General Tso’s, which probably saved me hundreds of calories, but it’s time to get real again.

Since I have an extended weekend every week, I can already see a cycle of “getting back on track” and “letting myself go” just because of time management. It’s very easy to rationalize doing this, and if I just plain don’t want to walk the line, I can get very cranky. I’m not particularly cranky right now I don’t think, but it IS almost 4:30 am, and I was on an awesome sleep schedule until precisely 3:30 Thursday afternoon, then the naps and the staying up took over my body by storm.

I often don’t even mind working out, it’s just that I’m stubborn enough that if you tell me we should run at three in the afternoon, I will say we should run at two or four just to have the final say. That may have something to do with how important it is for me to “own” my workout. So I hope I work out more than just when I have scheduled to run with Anna.

I also love to hang out with friends, and that usually entails a late night. I need to manage that better. It feels strange to schedule a day, but the only reason I’ve lost any weight at ALL so far is because I’ve declared a goal and tried to stick with it.

I believe I weigh 238-240 right now. I doubt I’ve plateau’d, but just reigning in the taco bell isn’t going to carry me much farther past this. I need to buy a good pair of shoes and then cut my debit card in half and make cash withdrawal s from the bank if I truly need cash. I’m not hurting for money, but T. Bell comes easy and having money when I need it is never a guarantee.

Anyway, Anna and I are supposed to run in the morning I think. She’s going to ask me if I want to run, I’m going to explain to her that I’m exhausted (any other point in my life I would just as soon sleep until 1:30—that makes me anxious rather than proud. Weird.) and I’m going to try real hard to go running with her and not make her cry.

My feet have recovered from bruising despite my trying to keep them inundated with extra pounds from food and such. Tomorrow will be the litmus test for how soon I need to buy shoes. If my feet are killing me Tuesday, it’s time for shoes—if they are not, I can wait till this weekend lol.

Okay I’m falling asleep on the couch, time to go spoon my lady and zonk out for about 6 hours before getting to it.

Oh, one last thing. Monday is going to be “Productive Detox Day.” I can see that being an acronym that Anna and I use for an extended time. “Can we have a PDD soon?

In other news, there are a variety of intramural sports available for play that I need to get into! Badminton intramurals are available—I needs be gettin’ in on that shit.

Really falling asleep now, I just had a spare minute so I thought I’d share. Good night!

--matt